She told me that she had to rub her face against me because she was part cat.
Checked out the free sonogram van on campus and got a free DVD of my sweet food baby.
Legitimately semi-blackout across the table from the governor off a chardonnay i can't even pronounce.
The lid of our salsa is promoting a contest that ended in July '09
I was to drunk to walk in jimmy john's so I called and got a pickle delivered to me outside the bar , too much?
Just finished off a roll of paper towels. Celebration blunt?
I don't understand but I'll be there in 5
You should know that Team Beyonce's Vagina dominated in pong last night
I basically have a picture with a half naked foreign exchange student. He kept screaming rolltide and i felt like a traitor
6 beers and it feels like I've been drinking water... Daiquiri time
Tonight just try not to threaten to pee on the hot guys buying us drinks....please..
I got high with the cantor. Rethinking this whole non-practicing Jew thing.
just got caught singing "pop that pussy" by a very old man at work. *face palm*
i asked my neighbor to open a bottle of vodka once and then we slept together
I fell asleep while eating jimmy johns last night and then woke up at 5am and continued to eat it
Ive completely stopped wearing makeup. Not even eyebrows. Thats how sick of wisconsin I am.
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