I'll bet she douches with gravy.
You even been so high breaking up weed with your fingers feels like surgery?
I decided that just having that story under my belt and being able to tell it to my grandchildren is worth the regrets of the evening.
I know it is almost summer when the students in my night class start showing up drunk.
She washed lettuce and peppers in the shower and proceeded to make a salad
Just watched the couple I sit for and 4 of their friends shotgun beers like college kids. Please let this be us when we get older.
The stripper from Delilahs paid the desk clerk to find out my room #. Either Im doin something very right or she's doing it worng.
She tried to lure me back to her house by saying she had "real" pizza.
Let me start this apology by saying you were the finest piece of ass I ever had.
Tequila me may have very bluntly told him that I wanted to touch his abs.
I just found a 2 minute video on my phone of you throwing up in a fake plant.
I stole a fireplace last night.
her vagina just converted me to Judaism.
I hope you gays don't get too crazy after DOMA. Gay divorces aren't any better than straight ones.
Is it a bad thing that I've made out with everybody I work with?
Randomize
