Just tipped at a bar in cheerios. Suck it.
Why's my alcoholism being used to prove a point?
so exactly what does one wear to an abortion clinic?
My chemistry professor just asked me if I ever found a ride home from the bar last Saturday
just tell her a well fed dog doesnt stray far from the porch, and if that doesnt work just keep fucking her sisters
The thing is you're all "holy crap this isn't nearly as bad as I thought pissing on my own face would be."
Just got invited out of group to take shots after hearing her gay friend say "why would I give him my alcohol so you can suck his dick. It's going to be a good night
He lasted about 30 seconds then said you can't win them all. But then he made me pancakes so it's okay. We shall call him mancakes.
Just woke up with an eye that wont open, a half eaten piece of pizza on my chest and a raging boner.
Dude. Yeah. This is a game changer. I feel dirty and possibly pregnant and it hasn't happened yet.
He's a fucking asshole. Who gives good head. And seriously I have never seen someone less committed to hair color
Two days later and my throat is still sore. That bong is a double edged sword.
You peed on a pole and declared to a cop that it was your pole and yelled at him to not even look at it, and then yelled at all of us for looking at it.
He made the moves first, we made out...then we folded his laundry.
I noticed while having sex on Friday that I have great endurance. CrossFit works.
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