I just googled "semen solvent" and got nothing. there has to be something that will wash this shit off!
I see a marketing opportunity
i just ran into our bio chem professor at the bar. apparently, he doesn't follow the "no slapping your students' asses" rule.
I actually had fun getting arrested. That high.
Currently separating the burrito I just stuffed in my purse from the weed in my half smoken bowl that was already in it. My what the fuck moment beats yours.
Everybody knows the last week of summer internships include showing up to the office hammered and hitting on the CEO
He tricked me into going on a double date with him, I don't like that he's not using me for just sex anymore
Full contact beer pong was definitely not my best idea.
Breakfast Clubbing as Juggalos. I can feel our IQs in freefall.
In the last 3 months, I've slept with an ex,someone single, someone in a relationship, someone married, and someone divorced. I should get some type of grown up girl scouts badge.
He's a real gentleman. At least he tried to flush my closet's handle after he pissed in it.
Sorry for drunkely attacking your best friend with a bow and arrow then loudly crying myself to sleep....PMS?
whenever i get involved w someone i'm gonna give you their number to testify to the fact that they should not fall in love with me
I was having a dream that I was swimming in a pool filled with melted chocolate but woke up to find I had poured chocolate milk all over my body
Do I masturbate or eat a pound of matazah. Alissa help what do I do??
I'm studying. I have a really exciting life lol
It's hard to say that sarcastically after having sex in a movie theater
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