Ehh boy. FML. she was unattractively large.
I just puked in an auto zone parking lot. I'm never eating peanut butter and red wine for dinner again.
i don't even want to say how many boners i've caused this week
Yes perhaps we are both wrong. And did you call me bj girl?
I drink more single than I do in relationships. Except with assface.
Woke up next to a tiki torch spooning a plastic flamingo on a welcome mat i've never seen before with a "happy valentines day" balloon tied to my wrist, oh yeah and "i am a cougar" is written on my chest in sharpee and all the kitchen furniture is upside down...
I think the name vodka for a girl is amazing
he wears New Balance sneakers on a regular basis, did you really expect the sex to be more than decent?
That's like doing a cinnamon challenge in my vag - but more painful.
I definitely think you should enjoy one last spring break being a sorostitute before you get serious and settle down with price charming. I mean hes not going to be there any way. he can wait a week.
Sooooooo Your wife and your girlfriend are making cat noises at one another via text
I'm going to talk him into letting me tie him up, and then just leave him that way and go meet you for fro-yo.
Just a little drinking. So much fun and love. The world is a shiny wonderful sphere in the sky so why shouldn't we celebrate?
I just wish he would stop trying to bring his emotional baggage into our sexual relationship.
your marriage is hazardous to my nightlife
yea, mine too.
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