i can't wait to go to hell
yeah...all of my friends will be there for sure
if i died would you start the facebook group?
If i theoretically had to put an iv back in what do I need to do?
My bruised ribs were so worth that win in beer pong
I tried to interpretive dance to Candy Shop to stop the awkwardness.
My attorney has my name in her roldex as need to hit that. Im gonna win my case
He looked like he was trying to woo a lady version of himself by playing goblin music on his guitar.
There's glitter in my speakers, piles of cheezits on the floor, a random Audi in the driveway and a homeless dude napping in a lawn chair in the backyard. Wtf happened last night?
Let us bow our heads and pray that I don't throw up in the tub
Reason # 294827284949272 i could never be a cop. I would just shoot. All the time. Ppl. Animals. Inanimate objects. Air.
Also, fucking on half deflated air mattresses is a great full body work out.
Great news. I WILL BE FUCKING IN A BOUNCY HOUSE TOMORROW.
can you please not set my house on fire for once???
I'm looking for whatever I can find, and afford without having to eat my emotional support cat
I think every girl deserves a pregnancy scare. Because then it just feels like such a priviledge to be bleeding out of the vagina.
I legit just did a jig towards my box of tampons.
Randomize
