I thought you said his peep was too small
it is but i have no money and nothing is on tv until 7 when americas next top model comes on.
She was walking with the authority that 2 beers gave to a light weight.
Then she opened the door and pitched the dead squirrel out, yelling "TELL THE OTHERS WHAT YOU SAW"
He was very impressed that you could put your hair in a ponytail by yourself while throwing up.
We're trying to see who can drink the most and still be eligible to donate blood tomorrow.
You know what's soul crushing? Walking to subway and find out you were too drunk to put on shoes and being denied service.
Um. I literally have no words.
Question: would Brian be pissed if I brought his 17 year old sister as my date to the wedding?
I don't know. Something about answering "what did you do on Sunday?" Seems odd when the reply is, painted, went to the grocery store, put a restraint device on my bed.
Please come quick there are people in suits here judging me
Bored at work. googling vodka waffles.
I'm gonna eat you out. But for science
I mean, he drove your car and it burst into flames, if anyone cant be trusted, it's him.
Dude, they hit that lizard part of my brain that tells me to fuck people.
Preach sister.
When I woke up today i said I will NOT sleep with her. This morning I did the walk of shame into work wearing the same clothes... How was your Monday?
you were shouting "me peeing on him is the closest he'll EVER get to my vagina!"
Randomize
