i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
You know, Peter Parker would not have been nearly as cool if he had gotten bitten by an ant.
I'm going to save the lime from my McDonald's salad to use in my Corona later tonight.
I just googled the nutrition facts for a mcgriddle and yet I still want to go to mcdonalds
Sometimes, in the course of human events, people get lit on fire.
Reindeer Drinking Games will soon commence. Get over here while we're still sober enough to answer the door.
Hurricane Earl: Get Blown party at my house friday! Byob: bring your own bitch/booze. Must have 80s blown hair style, kazoo/noise maker (vuvuzelas/airhorns are allowed), and/or bubble wands. \n
Why am I even shocked you're doing this....
Fuck. These are the symptoms I had when I was pregnant. This could be bad.
Well, there are worse ways to make $50 at a gay club.
Can an epipen be used as a tranquilizer ?
Her Grandmother felt me up AND paid for dinner. If she doesn't get her shit together I'm gonna be her Step Grandfather.
Yep I can make a seagull sound. It's identical. I tried it. They thought I was talking to them. It's pretty cool.
Dude it's SB. It's a proven fact that all you need to survive on is beer, weed, chips and maybe some amphetamines
I just put on underwear fresh outta the dryer and it's like tiny Angels are giving them warm supportive hugs all over
You ever just SEE a guy and know he's good at choking someone out?
It's 3 am.
Randomize
