I will come over but only if I don't have to take my sunglasses off for it
he shaved USA in his pubs
If you dont, I will tell Dad you are gay.
Fine, and I will tell him you fucked his business partner
Previous statement retracted.
i don't know how the hand towel got involved, but i peed all over it
Did my good deed for the day.. Helped an old guy hide his beer on the NJ transit while the ticket lady came by
I know this is random but to this day I regret not having sex with you on that atv on the top of that mountain underneath the American flag.
Yes but that point is quickly negated bc u should never have to search more than one room to find your underwear.
He literally took a shit in my bathroom and then broke up with me.
You should never be more than a quarter of a mile from a working toilet
Preach!
They put me in room 420 every time and I take bubble baths and smoke in the room and they bring food TO MY BED
I had sex with him and I blame the Doritos
So why exactly are your shoes in my freezer?
How high?! We watched paid programming for 45 minutes before we realized it wasn't just a long commercial. So pretty high. The Bionic fish finder looks promising, though.
Lets get a boat first.
Yes we can sext. I'm taking my socks off.
Just peed on the front lawn of the capital building. Great American.
Randomize
