Mustard is by no means a replacement for yellow wall paint
this is something i pride myself on being below average for
I don't care how hot he got, I can't get past the PTSD flashbacks of the first time he fingered me
I just wanted to share with you that my life has come to naked arts and crafts, to fix my flask, with a rum and coke in my hand... Good luck on your exam
Apparently campus cops frown on lighting a joint off of the eternal flame on Jerry Falwell's grave...
Definitely want to eloquently cunt punt those bitches thru the field goals of life.
I don't think you understand. Its the best fauxhawk you've ever seen. I look like a gay dinosaur.
That's the most beautiful thing I've ever heard. Can I call you littlefoot?
Hey so when you left last night was i wearing shoes?
When i like your selfie it means one of two things. 1. thats a nice photo, friend. OR 2. I wanna bend you over a table. But youll never know.
Okay so.. What's with me and guys who have more than 2 nipples
you left your anal beads in the dishwasher
Pretty sure my boss knows there's Jack smell coming out of my pores right now... He just gave me a look...
I just want you to know that i deffinately saw the baby clothes, and didn't freak out and still had sex with him. I'm going to hell.
All I remember was my mom walking through the door, and then me asking her if she wanted a hit.
my roommates gone so i can take codeine and sleep naked
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