He asked to "fluff my boner.."
How come I'm the only one who's around when people show up? I had just taken a shit, I wasn't wearing pants, phantom of the opera was playing and the fridge said PENIS.
whatever. i fb stalked him and his pic comments are witty. so i'm going for it.
I don't think the people up for their 8am class were as impressed with how many beads i got last night as we were.
You realize we can hear you jacking off in your room, right?
I like it rough
The cab driver thought we were passed out so he called a sexline...
It's like a squid of pain has attached to my head and it spreading it's whorey tentacles all over.
I AM THERE IN SPIRIT, TICKLING YOUR BALLS
So I'm thinking that so long as I have this piercing, I'm going to get tested for explosives at the airport
There should be an open time period where you show each other your goods and it's totally socially acceptable to bail.
I wholeheartedly concur
You only have to pretend to care about soccer until July. HE'S PRETTY DONT RUIN THIS.
I am the murdurer of this scooby doo episode
Tom just texted me he's Tindering from his hospital bed while they're running heart tests on him.
That's dedication to the game.
I would never blame a unicorn for anything.....how dare you
He showed his fake to the cop and was like "does the coloring look off to you?"
Randomize
