Turns out you're obligated under man law to share any passwords you may have for porno sites
Is that what they're teaching u at that bar review class?
I remember asking you "need some dick tonite?"
Yeah I guess to me frat party equals penis party. oh the wonders of vodka.
she sang that "this little piggy song" to my balls. and somehow made it work, with me only having two balls instead of five.
They had miseltoe over the keg.... thats cheating
So at what point do I tell her that I like fucking these hot southern girls more than I like my relationship with her?
besides im still about 80% sure that im eskimo brothers with jerry springer
something isn't right. i offered to be his sex slave and he declined..
So I just chugged the rest of the wine in my mug so I would have something to eat my corn flakes in. With a plastic fork. I need a dishwasher
And maybe a life coach?
Really? And is this the kinda party we talked about earlier?
Yup. It's just me crying in a closet eating soup
I'm gonna call it the Reunion Tour. Hooked up with two different ex girlfriends in one day...
You were so high that you only FaceTimed me so that you could stare into your own eyes and not actually say anything
I have to shave my legs first. I'm afraid tiny woodland creatures will fly out if he tries touches them.
He called me dainty, then fucked me like the Viking God he is.
Why is the floor coated in a 2 inch blanket of popcorn??
so you might not believe this but he made a powerpoint. and gave you a 3.5/10.
Randomize
