I will come over but only if I don't have to take my sunglasses off for it
so i just saw your dad embarking upon a biking journey in full reflective gear
...this stays between you and me
Don't text me when you know I'm doing lines on my phone
We just saw him running from campus police a few minutes ago. So no, I don't think he's still passed out on the quad.
I want the one making out with the dumpster. Is that bad?
come help me. im curled up in the fetal position on the upper floor of the lib. please bring more caffeine or alcohol
its ok. its hell week the lib is a no judgment zone right now
Ugh I miss culture and lesbians already
Omg he has a washer and dryer IN his apartment and lots of back up toilet paper. I went home with an adult. My uterus is pumping out eggs beyond my control.
I can assure you I didn't go home with a girl, because I woke up on someone's porch
Apparently I was drunk enough to call he police station and ask if there was a problem with me.
I immediately woke up from my nap, made myself a screwdriver and got in the shower. I know it's spring break but I'm still questioning my life choices.
Sorry my friend with benefits tried to run you over with his car
Life's hard when you can't differentiate between retrograde and PMS
my lips are numb and my face feels like a pool. PENGUINSSSSSS
Share, now.
i told you i was taking the Metra Train, and you asked what type of drug that was.. so yes i believe you when you say you were fucked up
Randomize
