why would she put his p in her m after it was in her a? that's gross
its gross she let him put his p in her a nevermind his p in her m after p in her v. cleaning up is necessary
i put my m on your v after my p was in your v. no big deal
alex threw up in my bong. i'm going to call it a night.
went out last night and woke up on the bathroom floor again, thinking about just moving my bed in there.
They peed on our pledges last night... i dont know if i should put an lol at the end of that or not
there was some random girl that nobody really knew, standing in the corner trying to shave her armpits with a plastic butter knife.
If I'm gonna go to jail I'm gonna be wearing a poncho
I woke up this morning peeing out bubbles . I smell like baby wash . What the hell happened .
In sex ed. they really need to include a lesson on saying tampon in foreign languages, just in case.... Trying to ask the woman at the reception desk, who barely speaks English, for one just turned into an awkward game of charades.
I spent the day drinking wine and meditating. I'm zen as fuck.
I'm adopting to save the world from the moral outrage that would be my offspring
VAL. THIS MOTHERFUCKER IS LAYING IN MY BED WEARING A CAT SHIRT, VAL. COME SAVE ME, VAL.
I went shopping for a dress that was baptism and bar appropriate.
Mom and I shoplifted today. Her idea.
Retirement sounds fun.
Honestly I really just want to do you in the mail truck. Thought about it a lot today
Nobody's dick fell into my mouth tonight
Randomize
