My dignity? Collapsing on itself like a dying star.
drank two beers while on the toilet at home during lunch break. new high or new low, not sure
I love my bros weed
Im gonna hate it in like 20 mins though
is it just me, or are high schoolers getting sexier?
other girls like to lick balls but none of them live for it like u do
Im sitting alone watching titanic. Drunk. Without pants. Holding a fishing pole. Im pretty sure im okay with all of this.
Woke up with a chicken parm sandwich in my clutch. Aaaand I'm eating it.
I don't want to have to force feed him my vagina!!
Steve just broke his bong and some kid in an american flag bathing suit and no shirt just fell down the stairs. Its dangerous here
i was gonna do a lot worse than just throw cat food on you while you were passed out, but then you sleep vomited and i felt a little bad
Let's just not urinate on things that don't need to be urinated on
You put me in such a good mood with that road head, I bought everyone at Hooters donuts.
She broke up with me. I guess I was in the most chaste lesbian relationship in the history of the world and had no idea.
if you were broke and planning on using koolaid as a tequila chaser which flavor would you pick?
He has a penis. Therefore, he counts.
Randomize
