I did that thing again where I get way too drunk and go gay. Then wake up in the morning and freak out at the person. Yet another bar I cannot go back to
Some milfs here doing some blow
Dad?
I'm slowing backing away from her. I tried breaking up with her and it felt like I was clubbing baby seals.
My parents just suggested that we tailgate the midnight christmas service. this is my gene pool.
More likely there's a very shell-shocked cat wandering around somewhere, covered in potato peelings
passed a homeless guy with a sign that read "420 vetran" we gave him a bowl of bud
How dare you. Idk what you called me, and neither does google translate, but you better take it back.
She has the perfect pussy. Looks like a paper cut with a puff of cotton candy on top.
We ended up at a lesbian bar and all my co-workers tried to get me laid. This is not how I envisioned coming out.
Apparently I give handjobs in my sleep. So that's interesting.
11% beer and firearms, what could possibly go wrong?
So why are your hands bright blue and have you seen my roommate.
Both questions will answer each other.
Dude, no, you tried to sleep on the stove. I mean. You were pissed when I stopped you... but I couldn't have you catching on fire in my house.
Whatever douche. I sucked the dick that made you. I. Win.
my favorite part was when you kept waving @ that guy and insisiting it was your cousin..and it wasnt and wondering why he wasnt waving back lol you were legit PISSED
Randomize
