Uh i was pretty wasted sat, so if i was weird it wasnt me. It was just vodka bein weird w my phone
Tonite tequila might call you
Be prepared
The ratio was 19 to 1 and the 1 was lauren so it didn't even count.
Reading in my econ of energy textbook about the US' largest oil spill from the 1990's.. guess i can't sell this one back either
When are you comin back?
probably mid next week, depending on when i finish my remaining half gallons
They glued all of the ceiling tiles shut.
oh my god. you caused complete remodeling to a college campus that you don't even go to
Romney sounds like a middle school girl and that creepy ass smile makes me want to close my blinds
No cash. I had to buy four bowls of soup to meet the credit card limit. I'm not even upset. SO MUCH SOUP.
He tried to reenact Braveheart's freedom scream but got tackled by his drunk roommate who thought he was yelling that the handle he was holding up was free.
yeah, never be friends with someone with shitty eyebrows.. they obviously already make poor life choices
hooked up with someone last night while wearing walrus pajama pants. clearly I'm accomplishing big things in life
This really high kid past out in the corner of the room holding a box of cheez its in his arm. My idol.
Yeah but who says we can't be shitfaced and tan at the same time?
I guess I can check "drink alone in the dark" off my bucket list
That awkward moment when you were so fucking drunk lastnight that you and your fuck buddy wake up wearing eachother's clothing covered in hot cheetos with his cat curled up between your heads meowing. Thought you'd appreciate this moment with me.
this is the 3rd time this week I've gone to the liquor store to stock up for the next 2 weeks
Randomize
