therell be strippers and coke right?
no strippers. just coke.
i hate this fuckin recession
those bitches were sniggering at my man-pris like they were goddesses of fashion!
...dude i pray you are quoting something, someone, anyone...
you kept wiggling your finger at everybody at the party telling us this is how he fingered me. you seemed pretty upset about it.
Your two fuck buddies playing ping pong together. HOW. ADORABLE!
I love my boobs, they're the only thing that supports me. They make me a solid 6.
We should live in a duplex and just hook up with randoms for the rest of forever and be animal hoarders.
You went streaking and came back with your shirt inside out. Then said "it happens in the line of duty" and passed out.
It wasn't so much a one night stand as much as one night she puked on my nightstand.
Literally if she wants to make a big deal, I'd rather have shit smeared on my face.
I didn't even have pants on and you think I had an agenda
I heard drunk is the new sober. I heard me say that. To a cop. Can you come get me??
Well that's what you get for messing around with her vagina. I told you it was a fickle and insatiable creature.
what the hell makes you think you get to decide what your going to wear at our weding!?
Just fell down the stairs..might wanna call the ambulance jus take the weed out of my pocket be4 they come..
MY TITS JUST CAUSED A CAR ACCIDENT ON THE HIGHWAY! i kid you not!! i thinl the giy is actually dead
Randomize
