Seriously, stop being so datable w your movie/song prefs
I saw her while sober, and she is definately cut off from the penis ride
Helping high family members not look retarded is what family is for
I'm watching Cheaper By The Dozen. I almost forgot that Hilary Duff was a really shitty actor before she was a really shitty singer.
I stopped understanding conversations unrelated to vodka two vodkas ago.
So I cleaned out my gym bag. Found half a bottle of malibu.
You know, I could pretend I'm shocked but what's the use?
Carpe scrotum. Grab life by the balls.
She jumped on a table and took off her shirt and started yelling things that no one understood. For being 3, she has a dead on impression of a drunk party girl.
she wanted me to tie her up with my playstation charger cord. i kept on hoping she wasn't a squirter. those cords r expensive. could have def been a Sony commercial tho
We did it in the bar bathroom and the bathroom attendant sold us a condom. I love Nashville
My dick has been in way too much crazy the past 2+weeks, but hey it feels good to fuck consistently again
At the light, his mom pulled up next to us while I was giving him road head. He forgot to tell me she was meeting us at the movie. So long story short, I convinced her I drove myself, pick me up in 20.
I'm ne vrr drinkjng againnnnnnnn dforeal.
He asked if I could not say his name during sex cause he liked the girl in the apartment above me.
I realize that my conversation topics seem to only be about bees and my cross dressing fiance. Thank you for being my friend.
Randomize
