Do you think Conan would leave his wife for me?
her fupa was seducing me. this is the last time i'm doing shrooms.
I cant believe Lindsay Lohan feels like this every day
well judging by the amount of dired blood around my nipple rings i'm gonna assume it was a good night
there was a trail of blood coming out of one of the bathroom stalls. thought of you
Believe it or not, Travis and I simultaneously breaking beer bottles over eachothers heads was not a good idea.
you can't tell me it's over and send me pics of you and your cat?
I woke up to find my purse full of puke, and all I could think was not again.
This guy smells like mr Rogers puppets and I don't know how to deal with it
You can't just beat off while driving someone else's car. Thats a rule
Thats your rule and this car is nice
Me and tommy were trying to figure out why our printer was jammed, found a condom stuck in the paper slot. #collegeprobs
Good, I don't think Coke dipped ring pops hold up in the mail anyway.
I think everyone at the office can tell I'm dehydrated
you mean still drunk
I've heard it both ways
she just kept pointing at the cows and calling them field penguins
I mean, if I asked you, would you cum on cotton candy for me?
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