Is it bad that everytime I read or hear "Woo Hoo" I immediately think of sex because of The Sims?
is it trashy that while he was throwing up in the bathroom, i was hooking up with his childhood best friend?
bring the vodka.
i thought we were going to mcdonalds..?
we are.
he was alternating between taking bites of butter and bagel. he said it was easier than finding a knife
he's paying for my abortion by participating in an alcohol study. dont try to tell me we wouldn't be classy parents
I asked this couple what they would like to drink and they leaned toward me eagerly and asked if we still have THE root beer ... Idk if this is code for please add cocaine to my drink
You seriously knocked all the beer off the table, broke the beer pong table, broke the bar and kept yelling "you have to warn me first!" all because I wouldn't let you have another four loco
I just walked out topless, stared his brother straight in the eye, and ate all the rest of their cookie dough.
He was asleep with his head on a windowsill and you were petting his head, then you almost left the kitchen and then went back to pet him some more.
He slapped my ass... He best ask me out. Or figure out how to unslap my ass.
He had Homeward Bound on VHS how was I supposed to not fuck him
Thirty seconds is a long time in jizz time...
I think I must have activated my bat signal.... All three of my FWBs contacted me today!
Sorry for prompting a philosophical penis discussion at 10:45 on a Friday night.
I just saw a guy walking down the street without a shirt on and holding a samari sword....
Randomize
