someone took a shit in my car last night and left $5 on the seat...
so pretty much your parents know your seeing a girl on the side, let her come over and just dont say anything to your girlfriend?
I felt like a body pillow being humped by a twelve year old.
it wasnt like "sexy" or whatever. like...she was smiling just standing there butt ass naked
tasteful.
dizzyuy bat. 3.453 lkos. hoit sx, now im single. blackouteed
Rachel and his cat watched us 69 last night. I pretended to be embarrassed the next day... But to be honest I like an audience
Dude, its flawless. what could go wrong?
Jail. That could go wrong.
I would let Bear Grills repel down a waterfall using my dick if I could go to sleep right now.
he busted into the room with single cheese slices and started yelling "THROW SOME CHEESE ON THAT BITCH"
You need to stop thinking about the needs of your vagina and concentrate on the greater good
Yeah, this is not that. This is a father and son bonding moment involving my all of my orifices.
What drinking game we play yesterday? Fight club or something?
Don't be hating on my everclear. Never taken a smoother journey into intoxication.
Is texting an old booty call with "can you still get your ankles behind your ears?" an appropriate way to reemerge into the singles scene???
I’m done with him. I’m going to the beach to catch a fresh dick
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