I am not having having sex with guys at the moment.
I can pretend to be a girl if you want. I have a tongue.
new number. flushed my phone last night when i puked, made B help me look for it for 2 hours.
What do you think that old couple was thinking when they saw me puking in the QT parking lot at ten in the morning?
The weather is perfect in Seattle right now. Warm enough for girls to not wear bras, but cold enough for me to see them nipping out in the shade.
Laurln. I am dying. I am npt alive. Adderrall is not a real thing. Death is a rwal thing which I understandably
No i'm not calming down the girl at white castle did not need to see the picture of my dick on your phone.
It was dark, she woke me up, gave me a blowjob and then whispered in my ear: do you know who I am?
You said dick pics aren't attractive
Random ones, from strangers, no. But a beautiful penis I know and love, absolutely :3
she's sitting there like the lesbian godfather. A cigarette in one hand and a titty in the other.
I should be trashily making out with an air force cadet in the beach volleyball court by now
I was lying I actually don't, I hope a reindeer shitted in her bed
I know that you sometimes make decisions based on comedic effect, but losing your virginity shouldn't be one of them.
This is the worst drive ever. Im hungry, hungover, i gotta shit so bad, and the only radio station im getting clearly is playing alvin and the chipmunks christmas songs
what could you have possibly accomplished by watching 6 hours of a mythbusters marathon
well, i added sex in a wind tunnel to my bucket list
There's so many drinking games in the Olympics.
you missed out this chick was licking her paddle
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