I really like you and I'm tired of just hooking up. I want you be my boyfriend.
Uhh, I'm not breaking up with my girlfriend to be with you.
umm..so Dad's wearing a thong, I don't know what to do
put a dollar in it?
It's a sad day when you realize you are no longer above fucking in movie theater bathrooms.
That's the great thing about NY, if you pee your dress you have an entire cab ride to air dry your panties before the next club.
Pretty sure that this text will cost me like $5 but just wanted you to know that I just smoked a bowl of kush, about to walk around shopping for hookers and i get 3 credit hours for this study abroad .... have fun studying for finals.
I wish his dick was as long as his hair.
Its completely acceptable to go naked under my graduation gown right?
Some ppl might frown upon it but theyre prudes
So what's going on?
We hit boys town to get stupid. I mean invading Iraq stupid.
dude, i just accidentally flashed your mom. BIG TIME.
Chicks before dicks must only mean American dicks
THEN YOU WILL NOT GET TO SEE MY TITS TONIGHT OR IN THE NEAR FUTURE YOU HEARTLESS BASTARD
I left him on his mom's lawn after he passed out in my lap and told me my vagina smells like flowers. Couple of the year award
Just got an email from match.com trying to match me with My ex..I nearly pissed myself laughing
location: under the moon. please find me. need ride home.
I mean that was the nicest way to be dumped by some one I wasn't dating.
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