Me= Watching Ferngully. My neighbor= Having really loud sex including multiple orgasms
Oh God
I know, but the worst part is I'm not really sure which I'd rather be doing. Feel free to re-evaluate our friendship
we got back to my place and he started talking about feelings. i politely told him to leave and that he managed to cock block himself.
never. drinking. again.
lets not get ahead of ourselves.
we just pregamed for our presentation... gotta love group bonding
He fell and asked for a beer and a band-aid.
HE GOT FOURTEEN STICHES
There is nothing like getting stoned and spying on people with binoculars
Uh oh I Hage to dance yes, my feet are Whitney Houston
she kept yelling about wanting tacos, so I gave her a piece of bologna in a tortilla. she didn't know the difference
i still can't believe we survived that barcrawl. the third bar had bullet holes and we still went in.
So that groomsmen was naked under his kilt. Also I just had sex in the elevator. And yes, those two updates are definitely related.
She left her panties here. They looked SOOO much smaller last night.
We have a nice shopping list..vibrators and roller blades
Priorities
So I've decided that blue balls for lesbians is rainbow balls and the struggle is real
I'm sitting in the hospital with him while he's still half drunk with a busted leg because he thought he could do parkour off a rock
I just googled "how to blow an uncircumcised guy" and did serious research. That's how badly I want to fuck him.
You misuse your internet privileges.
Randomize
