he keeps dipping things in ranch and feeding them to me
my ex gf has sooo many hot friends... i feel like im at a grocery store when on her fb... just shopping around.
If you can't do the LSAT hung over. You can't do the LSAT. That's the real practice.
Referring to yourself in third person during sex is apparently an instant turn off
I was ready to fuck him until he pulled the "I might be bi curious" card. Now its turned into a guilt fuck. It's like he's a 3rd world child in need of a sexual orientation.
Lets play a game called: how out of it are you today? Let me know if you can beat driving on the wrong side of the road twice and walking up two extra flights of stairs just because you weren't paying attention to what floor you are on....
spending my first valentines day single in 3 years blazed and eating heart shaped brownies i bought myself. WHO NEEDS A MAN.
I better not get a vid of you penile helicoptering
You're 31, how do you still outdrink all these college kids?
Practice, Irish genes, and a lack of desire to live past 40. But mostly practice.
Never go drinking with anime club. End of story.
I'm rolling and just noticed that the thread count on these sheets is horrendous.
Had sex outside for the third time last night. Mosquito bites all over my ass, and i think i have a rash on my nipples. When will i learn.
Just wait till winter
I want you to worship my cock.
That's not how you start a conversation.
He told me that I should keep my socks on next time because he read somewhere that it'll help me orgasm...
My Boss was giving porn recommendations. I think I'm scarred for life.
Randomize
