her sex was completely horrible but her weed was great. imma ask her out again
If our dicks could shake hands in congratulations they would
Honestly... isn't she a psych major? how does she go through life NOT realizing that everything she does is a cry for help?
I've been at work 30 min broke a paper towel holder a chair set a box on fire and fell down twice. Hungover Brian just reached a new level
YOU CAN'T BASE A RELATIONSHIP OFF A PENIS
I LIKE HIS TONGUE TOO.
I mean like, my liver will beg my brain for mercy. Brainll be like I'm Greg Jennings. Liverll be like I'm Darren Sharper. Brainll be like hold my diiiiick.
Hungover. Have to fix everything I've broken. I'm gonna be very late.
i keep seeing little orange spots im starting to freak out
you tried mixing adderall in your visine last night..
School starts Thursday. Don't fling yourself out of the car to throw up screaming "classy" before I park this time.
It's a new year.
He wins the giant teddy bear for getting the neuva ring on the dick
He offered me my choice of the Abe Lincoln or Ben Franklin dick pic.
I hope April is a better month for dicks. March has been very disappointing.
I lost all interest the day she banged that guy in the Amazon parking lot. That's a special kinda whore.
My conscious state is steadily increasing towards drunkenness.
SUFFER THE WRATH OF THE PISS BAG
Randomize
