Nicole wore just a belt and her pedometer and hopped on top of me last night. She "walked" 822 steps before we finished.
New charity walk idea!
Did she have bad breath? Bad breath makes you think of all the bad things in the world
Woke up un the hot tuv. Climbed out fo the hot tub and fell asleeo. Woke ip again in the hot tub.
I can see why you broke up with her now... it was like having sex with a corpse.
Heating the house with the oven may not be safe but at least it's always preheated
when im done with her im going to need you to carry me on your shoulders as i poses victoriously for all those who were within earshot
Periouds do not concern me. Biploogival needs are buological needs.
As soon as they started using chocolate milk as a chaser for captain Morgan, I thought l it'd be best to leave.
I guess I look like the kind of girl who would buy edible, weed-infused lube.
My roommates call me "Queen of the Skanks" I guess that means I've had a successful first month of college.
New life goal: fuck in the shopping cart
There are horrible decisions in life and then there are tequila flavored moonshine decisions
I just want someone to put their head on my boobs and laugh at my jokes ....
He then used a box cutter I keep in my car to open the plan b. Who says chivalry is dead?
You can't just bring up bondage and then stop answering me
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