when i say i joined a midget dating site why do u assume i was drunk
My Higher Power is John Stamos
She highfived me after i yelled "I'm the clit-commander!" when i came. kevin smith fan and clearly a keeper
well i did feel guilty about it. until i saw how hot the guy was the next day. now, nothing but pride.
He looks like the kind of guy that still collects pokemon cards
Google Chrome's "top 8 most visited sites" page has become my motivation to stop masturbating
I pulled my tongue muscle last night. your welcome.
Judging that there's a photo of me getting head while sitting on a graveyard tombstone.....not good.
Dubbing lion king over planet earth. That stoned.
We have 24 days left before I leave for college and 21 condoms left in the stockpile. Are you up for the challenge?
What the hell do I have to give up to manifest a dick
Our group of friends now have more broken bones than reasonable excuses for why they're broken.
It can't be easy when an alcoholic Russian is screaming to the entire dorm "he no get hard"
Omg no hes gotta go down on me. Then itll be like my vagina has kissed the stanley cup.
I can't decide which is the most disgusting: emily having sex on the stairwell of a frat, michelle shaving her vagina with a razor she found in a frat bathroom, or me getting fingered on the dance floor by some rando. opinions?
Randomize
