The human being growing inside of her was a mistake. Lets just hope the boyfriend isn't.
She is in my trunk
Far right against the wall..hiding come find me. dont tell oyhers hahaha
I just bought a large Pizza and Xanex in the same store...my night is complete
Apparently I signed "I love you" on my bar tab last night.
he ate 15 dinner rolls and nothing else. then took a shit in the bathroom came out and blamed it on his dad. i wish i was 8.
they were just spraying pledge on themselves and calling it lemon cologne.
The only thing I can remember you saying is "I won't cut pizza like this when I'm older."
If Bret Micheals dies..will VH1 have to go off the air?
You're the only one to love me enough for me to admit the following: Rock-bottom sounds like sobbing to a Miley Cyrus song.
Just got to Evans to buy weed. His mom showed up unannounced. Now the three of us are chillen. Super.
My "lord keep me from stabbing a bitch" prayer has gotten a lot of miles today
I was told today that I'm the ugliest bartender in the area, so, I guess I have that going for me.
Im so fucked up I'm drinking baileys and coffee just to stay awake.
It's 6 in the afternoon?
youll appreciate my drinking habit one day...
Randomize