forecast for tonight- shitshow with a chance of tbell
my version of bright and sunny.
pshh wine cellars. now if he has a tequila cellar whole different story
You make homosexuality sound like a cult.
Threesome last night. Not that cool, you tend to pick a favorite.
OMG HAIR ON HIS DICK. HAIR ON HIS DICK AS IN GROWING OUT OF HIS DICK. HAIR.
Got home. Hugged Mom. The look on her face indicated she noticed nipple rings.
Ummm so does anybody remember me stopping to get my ear peirced last night and make an earring out of a staple? Or did I just somehow lay on this thing and ram it through my ear?
How do I tell my Dad that in the picture he has of me and my brother as the background of his phone we were both rolling face on ecstasy?
I always congratulate people on their vaginal emancipation.
I'm missing a sock, a boot, and antlers. We need to get on that.
Look. When I let you cum on my tits don't fuck it all up by going "SKEET SKEET SKEET" it just pisses me off.
He said we would have a beautiful daughter together. That way too much for a one night stand...
He painted a swimsuit on me. Naked day at the lake was a success.
I decided to have a date tonight. Back on horse I go. Or aiming to be on a horse cock one day. You know. However that metaphor goes.
I will most likely miss you the least and fondly remember you as Mr. "I need a minute" but really need 24 hours and 4 extra inches.
Randomize
