im surounded by vag. Like smog aound LA, i am suffocating in an atmosphere of pussy
I least I know I can't get pregnant because it's on my hair
new low, shannon just screamed FUCK THE IRISH to a 10 year old's face then proceeded to throw a hotdog at his parents. I think its time i take her home.
We couldn't find any ping pong balls, so we used a fishing bobber. Could we be more country?
Checked out the free sonogram van on campus and got a free DVD of my sweet food baby.
His dick looked like E.T.'s finger. It scared me.
Between my vibrator and my iPhone carpal tunnel is inevitable.
Every single item that was in my fridge is now in my hot tub. Please help
did you not get the photos of the finger bruises on my ass?
Grandma can hear your bong from the living room, please be more quiet. Love mom.
YOU CAN'T JUST DO COKE AND THEN CALM DOWN
He woke up & asked where his pants were then asked where he was then asked who I was. Been married 20 yrs. He was drunkest ever.
Homophobes nationwide are huddled in their bunkers tonight and I can't stop giggling. Could be the wine.
I just realized. I havent even gotten a paycheck from this new job yet and already laid one of the girls most of the dudes are after
Bro i just made a pipe out of a mechanical pencil and the top to an eye drop bottle. Does that make me some kind of pot god?
Randomize
