i wanna do a homemade sex video in sepia and pretend were in the early 20th c
Everyone knows that the fastest route to a corporate advancement is to take a shot in the mouth
You better have your party panties on Saturday!
Why only Saturday?
Well I have an AA meeting Sat morning so I'm going to try to take it easy Fri.
worse. her friends hid in the bathroom while she gave me head and then screamed surprise right as i was about to cum
I'm drinking keystone with a homeless man I found. It's making me feel uncomfortable.
I think the best part was when you jumped over me naked.
I just found my coat check number in my underwear.
Writing apology letters and leaving them on peoples doors for your actions is NOT what I want to be doing at 6am.
I want a grilled cheese and an IV
he called us the olsen twins. we also rapped ignition much to his dismay.
I will forever be haunted by the image of you hurrying to finish your Jimmy Johns sandwich in the Taco Bell drive thru so you could proceed to order $17 dollars worth of shitty Mexican food.
Spotify knows me way to well. You mention swinger club and guess what it shuffles to? Danger Zone by Kenny Loggins
If its not for food we ain't going out.
Hiking for a first date sounded like a good idea in theory because there was absolutely no possibility of me blacking out. In practice, I'd rather black out than go through what I just went through.
Alone, in the dark, eating tacos and drinking vodka. Who's apartment is this?
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