Thong +tight pants =hungry butt. Not a good look on big women! Walmart sucks.
i thought they made a 7-hour walmart run, but they were actually in jail.
The only reason I give him head is because I know i'll get a back rub.
wow.
But it's a REALLY good back rub.
dont worry it didnt get any better. she locked herself in his room and was screaming at the top of her lungs "IM GUNA PEE ON YOUR BED"
He came to the party late, didn't bring tacos, and then asked what shennanigans we were getting into. I swear I will never fuck another hipster.
My roommate made me a peanut butter and sprinkles sandwich. Maybe tonight isn't that bad
Fair warning, if I start singing "Kiss Me, I'm Shitfaced" at any point tomorrow, just go with it
He was president of his frat and had a clap on disco ball in his room... or course I slept with him
100% truth: never tied someone to a bed using 4 pairs of sweatpants before
I feel like I'm eight miles away and my brain is just now getting here. You got a lot of fucking catching up to do.
Oh and apparently something happened that was related to "THIS IS SPARTA" but no one will tell me what I did.
So I'm going to blame my boobs hurting on that.
we just talked about our morning and what we were doing for the day and he handed me the addies and i took $50 out of my bra in front of a bunch of frat guys. so the mornings going really well
Guy in my class today said, "I'm pretty sure you think about beer 95% of the time."
I just asked my mom if I could be the drunk realitive at the reunion. She said as long as I'm not obvious.
Well, I turned down sex again. This is guy #5 in the past 2 weeks. My vagina is going to seek emancipation.
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