Oh just a soda. I'm "driving"
I feel miserable, can't drink that much when I go out
We've been saying that since '98
so I found out that he is the older brother of a friend of mine from high school
awkward
no it got awkward about 40mins later when he invited me to stay the night...with him and his girlfriend.
My idea of sleeping together involves doing the Humpty Hump. Her idea of sleeping together focused more on being fully clothed on the opposite sides of a king sized bed.
Cop gave me a ticket for public drunkedness, and then I convinced him to drive me back to the party
Tell her you can forgive her unacceptable behavior because her dad and his dog weren't married when they conceived her.
they pretty much knew i was there to get drunk and fuck their daughter
two questions - what stuff of mine was pawned and who has the pawn tickets.
I AM CRUING IT IS 93:2 AM AND I AM CYGIN INT BED
His flight is delayed. Mother Nature is delaying me from sex.
Maybe whip a sausage around while you do it and pour some beer on you. Like a German white snake video
I'm pretty sure I just came a kidney stone..
I'm like the kinda excited when David After Dentist stands up in his seat, screams, and collapses
I'm too drunk to remember your name. I'm too drunk to recall where i'm currently at. And i'm too drunk to give a shit.
Dude i just passed out while getting head...she cried
Randomize
