sunday morning discovery: something purple, smelly, and sticky my hair. any suggestions?
i want to have as much fun as i did last weekend. but plus the condom and minus the fear.
i knew she was desperate at the point in which she started showing me her naked pics on her phone
He considered it romantic when he told me mid-blow job that no matter what happens, he will "never forget how good of a dick I suck". Verbatim.
I might never shower again without beer.. I might also always drink naked
Sometimes he has weird facial hair...Basically he has a penis... that's what he's got going for him.
If I don't throw up the day I graduate i'll feel like the last 4 years and thousands of dollars spent on alcohol will have been wasted.
I made him leave at 3am, he texted me a couple minutes later and said the elevator was broken and he was sleeping in there, but he said I was worth it so I don't feel guilty
And some old guy told me Jesus loves me and I laughed super hard and told him sinning is fun. Hahaha
I'm surprised I haven't crapped out a leprechaun, I'm so hungover
i was really hopeful that i could make it to the end of the semester without doing something stupid enough to destroy our relationship but i guess i was wrong..........thanks vodka
I'm honestly considering asking her if I can eat her out, as a friend.
just in the smoking shack with my sister cheering on a caterpillar make its cocoon
I woke up not knowing what state I was in. Turns out, people from Deleware are pretty helpful.
I just bought a slurpee and condoms. God bless America.
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