you know you've been playing too much mario kart when you see a curve in the road ahead and see yourself drifting around it
well, if it gives you any insight into how crazy it was, i am currently wikipediaing "anullment"
she requested me as her brother on facebook.... biggest. letdown. ever.
I wish straight boys touched me the way gay boys do.
Don't worry we did the "promise to get an abortion" handshake
I told him the truth. Truth leads to vodka. Vodka leads to tequila. Tequila leads to prison.
Weekday college schedule so far: get high as tits. Watch Family Guy marathons. Repeat.
he needs to stop knowing everyone on campus...it's making cheating on him really difficult.
Happy meals everywhere. I think Ronald McDonald Claus visited.
No but I was fuckin done when I realized my acrylic nail caught fire when I was hitting the bong.
Seriously, though. As long as it's attached to you and is not a vagina, I will not be disappointed.
I'm in Home Depot and I can feel the straight bob the builders staring at me. I bet it's like I have a rainbow arrow pointing at me.
We stole a Christmas tree from the student center and then decorated it with everything we stole from parties... All I have to say is Feliz Navidad!
I just lost my handcuff virginity and not in the sexy way.
Is it acceptable to bring pot to a funeral or am I going to have to do this shit sober?
Randomize
