So that's a yes to the cocaine usage and a no to the rollerblading
he then started listing things that have been up his butt, never drinking in boys town again
unrelatedly i think im gonna download boogie nights just to see mark wahlberg's penis
don't you miss freshman year when you could get away with "but i've never given a bj before..."
He told me about his girlfriends trust issues during our post sex spooning
Nothing like all your friends getting engaged to remind you how much fun sleeping around is.
That was the first time I have seen a confused expression with a dick in the mouth
It's gotten to the point that the dirty talk in my head when I touch myself has your accent
Im done having sex . he ruined it for me after he said " can we use my penis as a shovel ?"
He shit in a sock dude, you can't come back from that
Things I learned last night: 1. Bacardi 151 is a one-way ticket to the toilet, 2. It is possible for a human being to turn into Mount Vesuvius
Not going to lie- I'm a little freaked out camping right now. This is one of those high activities you don't do by yourselves...or close to bears
My hungover walk of shame was interrupted by a stranger on a balcony throwing me a beer to shotgun... at 10 a.m....
I'm dying of laughter, but I'm also just dying
Send help
My professor just said irregardless, get me out of here
I guess he's ir-illiterate
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