wouldn't it be funny if when girls shaved their vaginas, they gave them sideburns?
So when does "going out for one drink" = giving some guy an HJ on the sidewalk?!?
dont try to nair your balls. i speak from experience
Just watched a guy puke off his bike. Beyond impressed. He didn't even swerve
I think she was eating a cup of ramen noodles while we banged, or had a seizure
i've been lying on top of my bed for the past 20 minutes
i'm about to blow half an adderall though and try to rally
You handed me a red solo cup filled with vodka and Bacon. You called it the salty Russian.
Lying on this bed is like lying on love and marshmallows and joy
You sent me a picture of you holding a goat then asked me if I would have day sex
Member that time when we got super drunk and had fun and fell in love
I remember it like it was tomorrow.
He told me I was 100% better then porn then passed out nto the cake
we left when one of the guys tried to stick himself with an IV that he found
How'd the date with the redheaded dentist go?
She didn't like my gingervitis joke
I'm so high right now that I winked back at a character in this TV show.
Dude, I'm sorry if you saw me getting head in my truck last night. My bad.
Randomize
