i permit you to call me
I am engaged
To a real live girl that has met me
I just saw how many times I called you last night. You're welcome.
I swear my cock just shook it's head disapprovingly at me.
can your parents tell?
i just had a cookie in one hand and a phone in the other and tried to eat my phone...they know
he left his wallet here so lets treat ourselves to a lunch for the lack of penis we both had deal with
She interrupted us having sex in the tent by threatening to kill us if we "got cum on the lasanga."
It's okay though. My mom didn't believe that they were mine cuz they were magnums. Having a surprisingly large penis ftw
RA just said I set the all time record for a student who lost houseing..30min..I was moveing out while my new roomate was moveing in. know of any off campous places to stay??
it's pretty awkward texting you how much I want to suck your cock when I have my mom on speakerphone.
On my way
He says we're "annoying" but that's an odd word to describe a couple of heroic liquor saiyans
When I'm drunk I really like to hold dicks. Like, affectionately.
This isn't good. I can't find my mom. This is why we don't give her Fireball.
I threw my shoes out of frustration and walked home barefoot... can you help me find my shoes in the morning
I realized just how much my daughter is MINE when I heard her tell someone "Go shit yourself" yesterday.
Randomize
