ugh, i have officially sinned in all of my cute clothes. i can't even wear any of them without feeling regret.
Five girls, one freshman pledge. We're like our own Make A Wish Foundation.
I think it's time we have the "weird fetish" talk.
So he told me he wanted to fertilize my caviar. Im avoiding all foreign exchange students from now on.
he asked if i wanted their team name to be " Amandas angels" or " Fuk budies" either way an intermural softball team of all my hook ups from spring semester is just depressing. convenient but depressing
of course! give me a few hours to recover from chugging a 4loko out of a frisbee, and it will be rage time yet again
See what happens chris. I told u not to invite her over. Now shes on her way to jail and were stuck with two pomeranians.
But I do know they give away thousands and thousands in booze
My liver has a boner
Did I just hear you ask Siri about the meaning of life?
I can't help you right now because I'm shaving my feet...like a lady.
Dude I just realized i did a camper walk of shame in front of amish people. I should have asked for cheese and a home made pie to cover it up. Im just lost shopping in amish country nothing to see here
I thought you died. Don't forget it's burger night.
You were giving me all the reasons why being the big spoon is such a responsibility, and how you wish you were a girl cause the little spoon does nothing
I kid you not. He let me in into his house, showed me the putt putt in his backyard. Offered to play me.
Because talking after sexting is equivalent to cuddling after sex
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