hi brent please bring bad word music cd must most bad word please brent bring cd music bad word please brent bring cd music bad word
I may just buy something cuz i have 6 weddings in the next year and a half.
Holy shittt I don't even have a bf
Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
I'm not ok right now. I just walked in on a 600lb woman passed out on the toilet and she walked out and tried to eat her cell phone. I'm on acid I think.
He scratched off my spray tan. Literal nail marks down my back. Can't imagine what's underneath his fingernails.
You went down on Rachel in front me last night. Worst. Brother. Ever.
It's like hey here is one penis enjoy nothing but that for the rest of your life
So I'm thinking about sending him some "sorry I almost peed on your computer" cookies. Thoughts?
COOKIE DOUGH CUPCAKES ARE A THING
Did you really just send me a blank text in response to news as awesome as that?
just walked across campus with a bottle of champagne in between my boobs. night two and the quest for classiness is already over
Also, just woke up in a Romney tank and sequin flag panties. Merica.
Got done with class, now I'm buying MD 2020 with the ex. Sure feels like college.
Everyone thinks it's an okay idea now until I'm overdoing it on the vodka/clubs, dancing on a table, trying to make out with the groom.
You drink too much. You cuss too much. You have questionable morals. You're everything I've ever wanted in a friend.
honestly, fuck you guys. i'm gonna get drunk by myself
Randomize
