your parents love me but you hate me
If you think im a hippy you should see these girls. They would scissor mother nature if they had the chance.
god damn woman. you are like the herpes of drunk texting. you never go away.
I wake up every morning and wish that I didn't have to wear a bra
do you ever think like no deep thought could take place in the spanish language? like all they talk about is like tacos?
how high are you?
I have a spoon shaped bruise on my ass...
After I gave him a handjob for a half an hour he told me I should be a taxidermist. I'm gonna take it as a compliment.
His new job just became new places to have sex at.
We should probably go now, otherwise the whores will descend.
Dude. If I met a dinosaur right now. we'd totally be on the same page. Brainwaves and shit.
I hope you get some kind or rare disease that makes your dick ties itself in a knot for fucking her you lucky bastard.
the bandages come off on Tuesday. we can try out my new breasts then.
That girl definitely just ate a hot dog and stared straight in to my eyes.
It's settled. One of us is going to bang her brother. The world demands justice and he's hot. We'll be the justice league if it were made of alcoholic whores
You don't understand. This boy has the Mona Lisa of cocks.
Randomize
