Yeah but my nose is so stuffed if I tried to give him head I'd suffocate
Well how sick are u. Ive got a good immune system.
These people need to leave so I can have rum and Doritos at work like every other American.
he told me that if i wanted to smoke he could make a piece out of my shoe. were keeking this kid around
Before he took my jeans off all he said was "no hard feelings from middle school right?"
I am way too high for this. Some guy just keeps talking about music and life goals and he apparently has lived in every city we mention we are going
I assume you will show your seat mates your vibrating cock ring.
I'm blazed about to take my 8am final. Another girl is too. We just looked each other in the eyes. She's my soul sister.
the bruise you left on my ass looks like africa. the other just looks like a hand.
The problem with that is that my car has been stolen
just bought myself a "your about to get violated in every way so you deserve this chipotle" steak bowl.
Side Note: Everyone in my office is getting engaged and having baby showers. And I'm all like, fuck your joy, I just want more string cheese in my life.
Every Easter every single one the baby Jesus butt plug comes up
i was ready to conquer the fucking world. i would have fought vin deisel to the death without hesitation
Soon to be ex is nowhere to be found. Her attorney/new BF just showed up. 30 minutes late looking hungover. Pretty sure I'm getting the kids AND the house!
Randomize