dude i doubt hes gay
I CAUGHT HIM BEATING OFF TO MENS HEALTH!
the jail released me with 39 mardi gras beads. I need details.
at the gym hungover with vodka in a water bottle. don't say i'm not fulfilling my resolutions
is the shake weight an appropriate valentine's day present?
Your my favorite hello and hardest goodbye.
And I especially mean that last part, half the time you pass out somewhere and it is impossible to get you to leave.
Just figured out I can wedge my iphone between my boobs so it stands up at a perfect handsfree reading angle. Clearly somebody up there wants me to smoke this bowl while I watch my bieber videos
It's been two weeks and I still have carpet burns on my knees. Well done.
On my way back to his place to see his "art". Why am I sure this is going to be nothing more than his dick in a box?
Now that I'm hitting my bong, I realized I haven't missed something so much in a long time. I love Thomas the Dank Engine.
Remember when we saw my neighbor taking dick pics of himself? He's back at it!
Come to the roof. We are drinking breakfast.
If I spent my amateur stripper money does that mean I am cleansed of my sins?
Well just give me the address, I'll bring the bourbon. If they let that into mental institutions
i got pulled over completely sober but looking like death. dick cop made me do a field sobriety test. he also said "no sober person could have 7 BK bags"
Now swiping left on 23-year-olds with abs. Is this adulting?
Randomize
