i've already watched her fall off the steps, walk up on our porch and try to dance with the dog, and stumble across the street to stand outside the neighbors window...is it taking it too far to watch this rando girl and some guy have sex behind our parking lot now?
We found him. 8 blocks away from the bars and almost at his parent's house. On the verge of tears.
if that blanket by the dog bowl was your dog's "bed" then i apologize to bailey for having sex on it
Well let's just say that she ended up trying to get it in with the wheelchair guy, who btw, can get an erection and quickly I might add
On monday, while we were having crazy monkey sex, I earned $82. Vacation pay rocks.
So i think i'm going to frame my summons tickets and give them to dad as a christmas present...
Old woman told me I looked like her son and then she started explaining to me how she wanted me to fuck her
Seriously, webMD this shit for me, I cant move and I dont wanna die until I have something worth fighting over in my will
Come on there are only so many drink coaster sizes nipples in the world
Apparently duct taping your dick to your buttcheks before the first time she goes down on you isn't as funny as projected. She cried because she thought I was a girl the whole time.
please let it be arousing that I used numbers to figure out how well I'd give you head
She's running around the streets punching people and narrating. I don't know whether to laugh or stop her
It's been 12 hours since I have heard from you and social media has given me no indication you are anything but dead, so that's what I'm going with.
I went to my AA meeting last night. My drug dealer is now my counselor.
I didn't mean that as an expression. I'm literally asking if you want to watch Netflix and do nothing.
Randomize
