Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
why wash my dick in the morning if you're not there to suck it?
THAT'LL be a good time.
and i don't know why my phone always capitalizes that word.
so i had sex last night with my 12th partner, but hes number 1 for my first time using a condom. i think im finally learning.
I think my new low is running outside in a towel to pet a particularly fluffy looking squirrel and projectile vomiting off the balcony.
Your friends turned off our power in the basement and when we went to turn it back on I got sprayed in the face with a fire extinguisher. FYI.
fuck it. im taking monday off to do some Jagering.
When my parents ask if I met any nice guys in California, I'm going to answer, "No, but I have gone home with alot of nice girls". Too much, too soon?
I'm pretty sure you and I ate the entire Keebler elf weed workshop
He's against "violent sex" cause apparently my body is "sacred". Like dude I'm about to tell you about blowing your brother just so you'll fuck me like an animal Jesus Christ....
I don't care if my next phone has to run on the blood of virgin koala bears, I don't want to be scrambling for a charger.
It's no longer hooking up, we have definitely graduated to Sport Fucking....
I just had sex on a roof
That moment when you're in a room with 3 guys and know how big their dicks are. Then you are married to the one with the smallest dick.
He's literally cuddling with the washer and dryer.
Randomize
