Is that you in the white hat?
Fine suit yourself
Is it morally objectionable to repay my debt to society with drug money?
two drunk chicks are talking to me about reinacting 2girls1cup
ill bring the camera dont start without me
We got really high and decided it would be a good idea to wash towels in the dishwasher. I left before I could see the final result.
he told me i smelled like babies and pine needles and he wanted to bathe with me. new boyfriend is not a keeper
The Angel on my shoulder is now resorting to merely reminding me that, "You will regret this later." I'm not sure if he's learning how I think or just giving up. Either way, should make life a bit more interesting.
Its like he woke the dragon, and the dragon is hungry for a good dick.
You crowd surfed from beer pong into the bathroom where you spent the rest of the night, also I have your wallet
I can feel your movements against the shared wall we are leaning up against. It makes me feel as though we are one. Queue Pocahontas song...
Hold on - sidebar. My best friend just threw a 40 pack of condoms through my window.
I sent him a cookie cake that said "Congratulations you're not a father"
Question for you. Do you want to go out somewhere or do you want to have sloppy joes at my house? That's not a euphemism for anything; I actually have stuff to make sloppy joes
I need to get all the one night tinders in my system before I move back in with my parents
We should get drunk in walmart
when?
20 minutes ago
She pregamed while taking a shower. Came out clean and drunk.
Randomize
