We stole some shitttt from king sooper's. fuck yeaaa
what did you steal
frozen pizza, cat litter, and preperation H. not much different than my usual grocery list.
I now officially know the distance between my two boobs is one twizzler.
Im so hungover that my 6 year old cousine made me aspirine and coffee out of playdoh...
just found a shoebox labled "emergency smoking box"... it has a lightbulb, 2 potatoes, a dried up flower, and a button that says "stop drop and roll". what did we do last night?!
Just bought a disco ball for 5 dollars, of course we're drinking tonight.
The prostitute across the street from us is having a seizure on her front lawn again.
Is adulthood just morning sex and then walking through the grocery store 20 min later looking for something to take to work for lunch?
...and then running into your dad at said grocery store...
I went to pick my brother up downtown and I stopped at a red light a homeless old man comes up knocks on the window shows me his penis and then screams money
He told me he deactivated his facebook because his girlfriend caught him wackin it to my profile picture.
10 points to you
I maxed out my credit card last night on powdered donuts and beef jerky
The only good thing about the sex was that he finally cracked the spot on my back that's been hurting.
FUCK the WHO, FUCK cancer, I'm gonna eat fucking bacon.
I'm determined to sit on that face.
We took three cabs to get home, the first one dropped us off a block away, so we went back to the hotel and tried again
Um..... I have taste. The only thing I am going to bedazzle is my vagina.
Randomize
