we should go somewhere reaaaaaal shady
I typed "housewife" into monster.com's search engine....I got zero results...kinda bummed
maybe i get so drunk and make stupid mistakes cuz Subconsiously im preparing for my real world debut
It's sad that he has such a beautiful cock and doesn't know what to do with it.
I wasted some perfectly good semen on her
Drunkenly auctioned off my bed for 3 tequila shots
Hey couldn't find water bottle to put margs in whole bottle in purse gonna stop and get cups and ice from starbucks and burrito from una mas want a quesadilla
Thursday nights need to stop happening to me.
What's standard gratutity for someone having a miscarriage on stage at a strip club? It's important.
You probably don't remember this but last night I bought you a lap dance from a stripper that had nipples that looked like runny eggs....you're welcome.
So I'm at the VFW tonight and the shot special here is straight 151 for 2 dollars. They must hate our livers
That commercial was clearly aspirational. I think Arbor Mist would pair nicely with Oscar Meyer
I told him if he cums in my mouth he has to buy me a cake that says "sorry I came in your mouth"
She made me baby bird juul smoke to her while we were fucking
I don't know why, but whenever I shave my balls I feel more aerodynamic.
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